How to obtain the perfect d & d group

D & D group, Friends

How to get the perfect group for your campaign.

Friends are the Most Important part of a D & D group

It amazes me how people go into random D & D groups, most of the fun for me is that its with people I like being around. That’s not to say you can’t meet new people, in fact I made a lot of friends through DND. It was the DM who brought us all together though. I am a huge advocate for playing DND with your friends rather than through a school club. I base this off my personal experience but I can also point to youtube videos of DND horror stories. Playing DND online with strangers can bring some interesting experiences to put it lightly. Playing with trusted friends reduces the risks of running into conceited players or creeps. 

Playing with friends also lets you tailor the campaign to them. You know your friends better than anyone else and most likely you are into the same things. Even if you are running a prewritten module you can highlight aspects they would like while dimming aspects they don’t. You are going to enjoy Dnd so much more with friends. You will know their boundaries on jokes which reduces the chances of world views getting in the way. DND is great for bringing you and your friends closer, which makes it a productive use of time. Another important thing to note is that you can still hang out even if the Dungeon Master needs to delay the session. Doing Dnd with people there to play Dnd, they will probably not be interested in doing anything else in the event that the DM isn’t prepped. This is important because the time you dnd will most likely be booked on your schedule, you want to spend that time with friends because you opted to play Dnd rather than do something else. 

Playing Dnd with a random group can be a fun occasional thing but I don’t think it matches your intention. I occasionally do random groups to meet people but I don’t like the commitment of joining a campaign if I don’t know if I will enjoy the group. Dnd with strangers may also lead to harder cooperation. Confrontation between party members does occur in Dnd and you never know how any one person will react. Don’t get me wrong, A random group can be great but if you want a perfect group real life friends are the way to go. The phrase No Dnd is better than Bad Dnd is true but I believe it is a defeatist mindset. Doing a random group will take a lot more effort to work and can be risky as it won’t pay off at all if the DND is bad.


How to convince your friends to Play Dnd

When I was first asked to play dungeons and dragons I remember scoffing at the thought. I had a preconceived notion of it being super boring. For me what changed my mind was the wacky shenanigans we were able to do in roleplay combat and exploration. The best way to get people into playing dungeons and dragons is to slowly introduce them to it. Host a one shot for your friends and make it lighthearted and fun. Lost Mines of Phandelver is an excellent choice for new players. Find something that the players like and emulate it into the game. Tabletop Roleplaying Games are simulators. You can have a soccer game and put it into DND. It would be fun for different reasons than an actual soccer game however the Book “How to win friends and influence people” recommends to put things in terms the other person understands. For example I love chess, and when people describe things in chess terms it builds rapport. Using your players interests is a genius strategy to lure them in.

Funny vs Serious

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DND campaigns usually go for a set tone. Having players that make everything a joke can be detrimental to a campaign with a serious story. Make sure everyone is on board with the correct tone of the campaign. You can also have a balance but you need to communicate effectively. People will always want to get a joke in when everyone is talking. Its human nature to want to add in and have the attention. Build a campaign with tone in mind. There isn’t an answer on if you should have a serious, funny or balanced campaign. Don’t let one funny player ruin everyone’s immersion and don’t let one serious player ruin everyone elses fun. Communicate this using a session 0. Its common advice but its super important. A session 0 can also be used to resolve gameplay maturity, scheduling and other expectations.


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We all hear that the hardest part of Dnd is scheduling time for everyone. Our group has definitely felt this as lives get busier. We started during the pandemic when everyone looked forward to Dnd because it was all we had. Now that other doors have opened up Dnd can start to feel like a distraction or chore. I would recommend hosting DND at a set date and whoever shows up shows. DM Pcs can help parties that don’t enough members. One of my favorite things to do is have a temporary party member. Dm controlled players can be super good or super bad depending on their execution.  Enough to where it will need to be a different topic. Having DND be consistent is important to not making it fall apart. Make sure people are engaged and not on phones while playing as well for best results. If scheduling is too much of an issue to where you can’t get a consistent group for a campaign, Try a West Marches campaign, a type of campaign that lets you invite much more players. Its an episodic type of play and the dungeon master can change session to session. You can even have two dungeon masters running two games. This makes DND much more of a commitment. For a guide on West Marches Campaigns check out the button below.


Traits to Look for in your Players

As a dungeon Master there are certain qualities I want in my players. None of these are hard asks. For example it is nice to have good roleplayers but is not a necessity for the table I run. Maybe you do want that though because you have a roleplay intensive game. My point is to keep it in mind. A universal trait that I would want though is to be easy going. DND is a game, theres no need to get super worked up and genuinely upset at the DM. Not only do you make a fool of yourself, you make the atmosphere uncomfortable for everyone around you. Rules lawyers can be helpful but they can slow down the game. Make sure people respect your authority as the DM. Another Trait to look for is communication, players should effectively communicate praise and criticism to make the sessions beneficial for everyone. Check out our other posts and thank you for reading!

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